beetrock

My job is not very exciting, so to spice things up I began streaming Air America, NPR and my Yahoo station over the gorgeous speakers inherited from my predecessor. The good part is that no one can really hear me – the cube walls are so tall and the air so thick with the dust of a public institution that I can blow out the speakers on Al Franken and Soterios Johnson and still, hardly anyone will notice. The bad part is that my little “operation” might get shut down by the IT department at any moment. So I might as well enjoy the radio while I can get to it! So today the major world developments that caught my attention were the mind-boggling diabetes statistics of India and a jerky reaction of Starbucks workers to a creative, money-saving fix by some coffee-savvy customer.

Details: India, apparently now has over 30 million Type 2 diabetics, most acquiring the disease as an outcome of overeating. Obesity is raging in the country where a percentage of the population is still starving, but the growing middle class is eager to chow on fatty, processed foods. Charming. AIDS, malaria and now this? Who will save India? Not us – we are busy eating deep fried hash browns and licking corn syrup off our chops. Which brings me to the news about Starbucks…

Someone has apparently come up with a “ghetto latte” – an iced Americano (diluted espresso shot) not filled all the way so that there is plenty of room for milk. Savvy coffee buyers then go to the condiment bar, fill up their glasses with milk and leave the place wallet-happy. The shop of course looses profits and the condiment bar needs to be constantly replaced with milk. Starbucks employees are outraged calling their customers cheap. What an insult!

A quote from a fuming Starbucks employee:

I’m amazed at the amount of you willing to make other customers suffer because someone is trying to pinch a few pennies. The condiment bar is a not a make your drink buffet. It’s a condiment bar. Not to mention your violating one of the primary company goals. “Recognize that profitability is essential to our future success.”

And someone replies with this:

Now is “profitability” above and below “enthusiastically satisfied customers” on your scale?

Excuse me, sucker. Is 2 dollars really pennies to you? I don’t think so! And how exciting for this simple issue to be translated into philosophical debate about company values. I am sure there is a Starbucks policy about “enthusiastically satisfying” their employee base. Perhaps that’s why minority teenagers working at the shop in my neighborhood throw chairs at each other at the end of the night, deciding who should be cleaning the floor. I am sure they are filled with enthusiasm. And seriously guys, WHO CARES? There are obese people in India, there is West Nile in New York, and Greenland is melting. Do we really care about some extra milk?

And why the hell does this story make national news? We can only wonder…